1. ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT?
I have plenty cat scratch scars.
2. WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR ROOM?
A framed print.
3. DO YOU SNORE, GRIND YOUR TEETH OR TALK IN YOUR SLEEP?
I mumble in my sleep
4. MUSIC DO YOU LISTEN TO?
Uhh....where do I even start? Post-punk, new wave, early goth, electronica of all sorts, proto-punk, hip hop, punk, glam, indie, shoegazer, old country music, rockabilly, some folk, and plenty stuff that is genre-less.
5. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?
Right after midnight.
6. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW?
A not crappy job and a gold owl necklace.
7. WHAT DO YOU MISS?
8. WHAT IS YOUR MOST PRIZED POSSESSION(S)?
My kitty <3
9. HOW TALL ARE YOU?
10. DO YOU GET CLAUSTROPHOBIC?
11. DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK?
Usually not, unless I'm walking on some unlit street or something
12. THE LAST PERSON TO MAKE YOU CRY?
Was not worth crying over.
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE PERFUME FOR A GIRL?
Chanel No. 5 though my Marc Jacobs is really nice.
14. WHAT KIND OF HAIR/EYE COLOR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?
15. WHERE CAN YOU SEE YOURSELF PROPOSING?
I wouldn't propose.
16. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINK?
Tea, but if that's not available some coffee concoction from Starbucks. Energy drinks are nasty.
17. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING?
Really good cheese, or pepperoni sometimes.
18. IF YOU CAN EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
A crumpet with Devon cream.
20. HAVE YOU EVER EATEN A GOLDFISH?
21. WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT SOMEONE EVER GAVE YOU?
22. DO YOU LIKE ANYBODY?
Many people, I have some pretty fabulous friends.
23. ARE YOU DOUBLE JOINTED?
24. FAVORITE CLOTHING BRAND?
That I can afford? Or that I can dream about? Afford = Forever 21 Dream about = Betsey Johnson
26. DO YOU HAVE A PET RIGHT NOW?
My kitty <3
27. WHAT KIND IS IT?
Enormous black cat
28. WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING?
I would certainly try not to.
29. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU?
Depends on the person.
30. SAY A NUMBER FROM ONE TO A HUNDRED:
31. BLONDES OR BRUNETTES?
I'm a brunette
32. WHAT IS THE ONE NUMBER YOU CALL MOST OFTEN?
I don't know.
33. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST?
Stupid people, being accused of being a hipster.
34. HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF THE USA?
35. YOUR WEAKNESSES?
36. MET ANYONE FAMOUS?
Sort of famous. I got hit on buy a guy who lives in reality TV infamy in the UK!
38. EVER DONE A PRANK CALL?
39. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU FILLED OUT THIS?
Applying for a job at Max's Oyster Bar.
40. HAVE YOU EVER HAD SURGERY?
42. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST?
43. HAVE YOU EVER HAD BRACES?
44. WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I don't know what I want from my parents but if any of you want to buy me MST3k DVDs or Vincent Price movies I'd be just peachy.
45. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT?
46. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
47. DO YOU WISH ON STARS?
49. WHAT KIND OF SHAMPOO DO YOU USE?
50. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
I do not
51. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
52. ANY BAD HABITS?
53. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD ON THE SHELF?
I don't know, I have a pretty embarrassing burned copy of Sing The Sorrow that someone gave me, buried in the depths of my closet...or did I chuck that?
54. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
I suppose so.
56. DO LOOKS MATTER?
For what? But generally we live in a shallow world, so yeah.
57. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER?
We don't talk about that.
58. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME?
Boston, I guess.
60. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD? I don't remember, dress up clothes?
61. HOW MANY NUMBERS ARE IN YOUR CELL PHONE? Quite a few
62. WERE YOU A FAN OF BARNEY AS A KID?
63. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
Me? Use sarcasm? NO! Neveeer!
64. MASHED POTATOES OR MACARONI AND CHEESE?
Macaroni and cheese.
65. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL?
I like cute awkward boys who are smart and have nice speaking voices.
66. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?
67. WHATS YOUR FAVORITE BAND/SINGER?
68. WHATS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW?
Mystery Science Theater 3000, duh!
69. WHAT WAS YOUR ACT/SAT SCORE?
Like I remember
70. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR?
71. DO YOU HAVE ALL YOUR FINGERS AND TOES?
72. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WORKED OUT?
Too long ago.
73. DID YOU NOTICE THAT THERE WAS NO #64?
Last time I checked number 64 was there.
74. WHATS THE FASTEST YOU HAVE GONE IN A CAR?
I don't know
75. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
Go for it kiddies!
76. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO?
77. LAST THING YOU DRANK?
78. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
79. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX?
80. FAVORITE THOUGHT PROVOKING SONG?
Too many, let's see....I'm a big fan of "Famous Blue Raincoat" by Leonard Cohen. It's totally a cliché but it's damn good.
81. FAVORITE THING TO HATE?
82. FAVORITE MONTH OF THE YEAR?
I don't know, maybe May since that's when my birthday is.
83. FAVORITE ZODIAC SIGN?
Quoi? I don't really have a favorite.
85. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOR?
86. EYE COLOR?
87. SHOE SIZE?
89. FAVORITE FAST FOOD RESTURANT?
Taco Bell...it's a guilty pleasure.
90. YOU LIKE SUSHI?
91. LAST THING YOU WATCHED?
92. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR
93. PLAY ANY MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS?
94. REPUBLICAN OR DEMOCRAT?
It's complicated but definitely more of a democrat.
95. KISSES OR HUGS?
96. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS?
97. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT?
A copy of Stumbling on Happiness.
99. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING?
100. ARE YOU IN LOVE?
No, but in the words of The Stone Roses "I wanna be adored."
[01.] Who are you?
[02.] Are we friends?
[03.] When and how did we meet?
[04.] How have I affected you?
[05.] What do you think of me?
[06.] What's the fondest memory you have of me?
[07.] How long do you think we will be friends?
[08.] Do you love me?
[09.] Would you date me?
[10.] Would you kiss me? .
[11.] Would you hug me?
[12.] Would you help me hide a body?
[13.] Emotionally, what stands out?
[14.] Emotionally, what am I lacking?
[15.] If you could have 24 hours alone with me, what would we do?
[16.] Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
[17.] Am I lovable?
[18.] How long have you known me?
[19.] Describe me in one word.
[20.] What was your first impression?
[21.] Do you still think that way about me now?
[22.] What do you think my weakness is?
[23.] Do you think I'll get married?
[24.] What makes me happy?
[25.] What makes me sad?
[26.] What reminds you of me?
[27.] If you could give me anything what would it be?
[28.] How well do you think you know me?
[29.] When is the last time you saw me?
[30.] Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
[31.] Do you think I could kill someone?
[32.] Are you going to put this on your LJ and see what I say about you?
Happy Valentine's Day
Things I Will Do If I Am Ever the Vampire
1. I will not pick off friends, family or neighbors of the Hero one at a time. This annoys the Hero and drives him into action.
They'll still be there when he is dead.
2. There are thousands of sick people who want to be vampires. Why pick someone who doesn't?
3. The Hero will come armed with holy water, a cross and a stake. I will come armed with a 5.56 mm assault rifle and grenades. If the Hero has to cross open ground, there is no better way to reach out and touch someone than with a sniper rifle.
4. When biting women to make them slaves, I will bite them in out-of-the-way locations such as the inside of the thigh, the lower part of the breast or other location not requiring painfully obvious alteration of clothing or ridiculous accessories to conceal.
5. I will equip my home with a marvelous device called a burglar alarm with an automatic dialer. It will be difficult for the Hero to kill me while under arrest for attempted breaking and entering.
6. My coffin will be concealed and will be a plain wooden box. The elaborate oak coffin with gold trim resting in the basement will be equipped with claymores [mines] designed to shred the body of anyone who opens it.
7. I will wear a watch and verify what time sunrise is every day.
8. The formal attire with cape will be reserved for special occasions. Jeans and a t-shirt will be fine for everyday wear as they are less noticeable.
9. I will wear _white_ clothing, which does not set off my pallor as obviously as black.
10. If I can't avoid wearing black all the time, and acting weird, I will go to bars which cater to that sort of clientele. It would make it more difficult for the hero to pick me out of the crowd.
11. I will not engage in a battle of wits with the Hero. I plan on killing him anyway so what's the point?
12. I will not dismiss a Hero as a mere mortal because he does not have my centuries of experience. Even inexperienced losers can get lucky.
13. There will be no windows, doors, elevator shafts or air vents accessing my Hidden Lair that have any sort of access to the outside and which sunlight can be directed down using mirrors.
14. If there must be windows they will be painted over and backed with steel plate so the Hero will face a rude surprise when he throws something through it at sunrise.
15. When I take the Hero's True Love to make her my concubine and eternal slave I will not show her off to goad the Hero into making an attack. That would goad the Hero into making an attack. She will be tucked away in a quiet room watched over by my loyal servants until the Hero is dead.
16. I will not transform children. Their bodies will stay the same age forever while their minds grow older and they will become whiny and disobedient.
17. I will not use bug-eating morons as servants. Pretty females dressed in little French maid outfits are more visually appealing and can also distract the Hero.
18. While castles and mansions are traditional and have certain flair, the two bedroom bungalow is less noticeable in suburbia.
19. My home will not have wooden furniture, the legs of which become sharp, pointed sticks at inopportune moments.
20. I will have one of my Entranced Subjects constantly observing the Hero and his party. I always want warning if they go to a lumber yard.
21. My home will have mirrors but they will be located in places such as the bathroom where I am unlikely to be at the same time as the Hero or his friends.
22. I will not change into a bat, scuttle up walls, fly or hypnotize people when there might be witnesses.
23. All my concubines will be fully aware that they are not to seduce, attack or even bother visitors staying in the castle unless they have express consent from me.
24. The blood in the refrigerator will be stored in a tomato juice container and there will be ordinary food in there for camouflage.
25. I will get a voice coach and change my name. "Hi, I'm Bob," is less suspicious than "I.......am......Dra. ....cu.....la."
26. I will not associate with vampire theatres, vampire whorehouses and prostitution rings, vampire bars or vampire biker gangs. They attract attention.
27. I will spend no more than 10 years in any one location and when I move it will be somewhere distant. I will not return to a previous home for a minimum of 80 years. Anyone who previously knew me will either be dead or senile.
28. I will be able to explain porphyria and why that unfortunate genetic condition is the reason I cannot go out in the sun.
29. I will force myself to look concerned and not hungry when someone accidentally cuts himself.
30. A Kevlar vest with a ceramic trauma plate located over the heart is a rather trendy fashion accessory.
31. I will take seriously anyone who approaches me with a water pistol and a confident expression.
32. Backpacks and small bags capable of holding sharp pointed wooden sticks will be taken from visitors by a servant at the door. Anyone refusing to part with their accessories will be taken into a side room and shot in the knees, handcuffed and chained to the wall where they will provide lunch for my concubines.
33. Crossbows, spears, arrows and other antique weapons with wood or large blades will be banned from the castle. There is nothing wrong with a fine collection of rifles and handguns.
34. I will carry at least a .38 on my person and become proficient in its use. If the Von Helsing is holding me at bay with a religious symbol or I am unable to use my vampiric powers for other reasons, I can always open fire.
35. I will be a strict atheist, so the hero will be forced to use a copy of "The Skeptical Inquirer" or "Das Kapital" rather than a Bible, delaying him considerably...
36. Before dining out with anyone, I will verify that garlic is not a major spice at that restaurant.
37. I will not take blood from people who take cocaine, speed, or other addictive drugs.
38. All servants, concubines and assorted slaves will be under strict orders not to show excessive devotion to me in public.
39. Servants, concubines and assorted slaves will have a zero-tolerance rule: one mistake and they're dead. I can always create more.
40. When recruiting new blood, so to speak, I will first enslave those who might notice odd behavior in my future concubines. Therefore, I take the teacher at the all-girls school first.
41. All future concubines will be screened and have complete background checks. Those with relatives named Van Helsing will be removed from consideration. The irony is not worth the risk.
42. Nothing says the Hero can't be a cripple or be suffering massive trauma from a shotgun blast before he becomes lunch.
43. I will not personally finish off the Hero. That is what loyal servants, concubines and assorted slaves are for. Besides, the True Love is probably tastier.
44. All future concubines will be stripped searched for rosaries, crucifixes and garlic before I approach them.
45. All cute but spunky kids in the community who express an interest in the supernatural will be identified and observed for sudden changes in behavior.
46. I will be an upstanding but otherwise undistinguished resident of my community and will make sure that I cultivate enough friends that I will be warned of anyone spreading malicious rumors about me.
47. Since it will be the last thing they would expect, I will hire a Mafia hit team to take out the Hero and his friends. Let's see the crucifix protect them from an Uzi.
47a. And if it does, I will immediately leave town (having been spying on them from several blocks away via a convenient hard-to-trace method of my choice).
48. All villagers will be encouraged to send their children to the schools I will secretly finance. After a few years of modern education they will dismiss the legends told by their grandparents, several of which will undoubtedly be ways to destroy me.
49. I will ignore all attempts to appeal to my former sense of humanity. I don't have any. That is why it is former.
50. I will remind myself that I am immortal, not indestructible.
51. All concubines will save the loose, transparent flowing silk dresses for special occasions. I'm a modern sort of guy so I like a woman in leather and Kevlar, which provides more protection so she lasts longer in a fight.
52. Although firearms are useless against me and the concubines they work quite effectively on the Hero and his friends. Therefore all concubines will be armed and taught to shoot. They will use hand and fang in attack only as a last resort.
53. All bodies of former meals will be destroyed in a manner which will make the absence of blood and bite marks impossible to identify.
54. I will not send bodies or parts thereof of former friends, relatives, mentors or lovers to the Hero in order to demonstrate my complete mastery over life and death.
55. I will not demonstrate knowledge inappropriate for someone of my apparent age.
56. I will not begin a vendetta against someone who has destroyed a fellow vampire that I was fond of. They have clearly demonstrated they have the ability to destroy me.
57. More vampires means lower prey ratio: I will carefully consider if I really want more of us running around.
58. All the cutlery in my house will be either stainless steel or plastic. No silver. (Besides, I might accidentally cut myself.) But ideally, the steel will have a special surface that makes it *look* like silver, so the Hero will waste his time trying to stab me with it.
59. I will keep important bits of my home flooded with a non-flammable poisonous gas at all times. Not needing to breathe is a useful skill.
60. As cancer isn't a particularly large concern for me, I'll wear asbestos clothing.
61. I will make lots of long term investments.
61a. With the great wealth I get from that, I shall endow a genetics program aimed at producing cows whose udders secrete human blood, or a palatable imitation thereof. Then I can go to McDonalds instead of bothering the hero's womenfolk.
62. While it may offend my dignity, whining incessantly will indicate that I am the protagonist, and will enable me to avoid the attentions of Heroes.
63. As cute as the Vampire Slayer is, there are other girls just as cute who are not capable of destroying me.
64. I will not engage a "Vampire Slayer" in martial arts combat, as that seldom seems to work out well.
65. If I find out that there is a "Vampire Slayer" living in the vicinity, I will consider moving elsewhere, regardless of the advantages conferred by that particular location.
66. When faced with a gang of spunky kids determined to stop my evil schemes, I will consider surrender. Or mail bombs.
67. I will put on lots of makeup and fur, and howl at the moon every once in a while. This should confuse the hero, and will probably enable me to get away with a silver bullet or two.
68. I will not consider property crimes beneath my dignity. Carjacking is a good source of income, and I don't have to worry much about the possibility of something going wrong.
The population of rec.arts.sf.written.
I just noticed how a bunch of people added me as a friend I had no idea! Yeah so apparently I've had Heather, Steele, and Jess were my lj friends and no one notified me. ILY guys, but seriously let me know when you add me, since I am Captain Oblivious.
Someone gives you a letter, and you pick 5-10 songs that start with that letter and maybe say a few words about them.
[info]rikibeth gave me P.
1)Pretty in Pink-Psychadelic Furs
Comment if you want a letter.
Because of the hospitalization my parents wanted me to leave Simmons, we reached a compromise and decided that I would take next semester off. I feel like such a failure. Everyone I know is excited to go back to school and I'm going to waste a couple months of my life at home. I know what I need to do. I need to pull up my grades so I can transfer somewhere else. Maybe another place in Boston or maybe a school in New York. I know lots of people take time off from school and that I shouldn't be ashamed of doing so, but I really feel like a big time loser. I keep telling myself it's just a few months and then I go back to Simmons. I've decided I'm going to pull up my grades and transfer somewhere where I'll be happier. I think I want to study speech therapy. I am extremely frustrated right now. I really hate myself at the moment. /angst
The results for the 2006 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest are up. Go look now!
Here's one of the winners:
"There was an old woman who lived in a shoe who had so much equity (because our story, dear children, is set in Miami's hot real estate market) that she upgraded the exterior to blue suede siding as a tribute to her idol, Elvis, moved her kids to a bootee out back, and then reopened the place as the "Are You Lonesome Tonight?" motel (but you'll have to wait until you're 18 to read any further)."
I am really sick and tired of pretty much everyone. /angst